Sierra Alfa

2012-01-03T05:26:00.000-08:00

i think i lost a friend. i really do. we were so tight. probably it was all my fault. we're close like a brother and a sister. we laugh and even cry together. we were so close like that. but few months back i felt so much changes in him. probably because i hardly see him since he started working. and when i do see him, all i see is the gap that will grow. bit by bit. probably its just how i feel. probably he feels fine whenever he sees me. but whatever i saw before was an innocent humble young man. who will always keep his profile low no matter how successful he will be. that's why we were close at first. because that was all i wanted in a close friend. i admit that i choose my friends.... my mistake towards him was when i decided to advice him on the things that i know is wrong, from a religion point of view. i am not a saint, but i will always try to be a good muslim... and its my job to advice him. when u care for someone, u will always do your best to make the person happy and guide him/her on the right track...

it didnt end badly.. there was just no reply. up until now. it has been almost a month now. but if YOU read this, please know that i appreciate every single thing that you have done for me. your care, your never ending help, your jokes that made me laugh all the time, and your time. thank you for everything bro..

Non-Believer

2011-07-18T09:55:00.000-07:00

salam everyone,

first of all, i would like to apologise for not updating my blog . life has been so hectic for me. it has been so stressful but i cant also deny there is also some happy moments in my life. i have been sooo busy flying for the past 6 months. it has been quite a roller coaster ride for me. my body starts to ache every time i get back from work. my sleeping patterns are just so crazy these days. wedding is just around the corner, but nothing much has been done. i just hate to be in this position where everything is just so last minute. everything is out of control. nothing is within my grasp. i need some moral support guys!

society man...! society!

2010-09-28T22:11:00.000-07:00

i am planning for another trip to somewhere next year! i feel like going to Alaska to watch the band of Aurora Borealis also knows as The Nothern Lights. I have zero knowledge about that country accept that it is one of the coldest country in the world. One of my reason to go there is also because of my favourite movie that i watched for so many times called Into The Wild. I LOVE the movie. I can never get bored watching it. It is not only a good movie, but it also teaches you about life and family, it also tells you how to appreciate everyone around you. It is a true story about a guy named Christopher McCandless who gave up everything he had including money and family. I felt like i was him. There are so many things that i wanted to do, but i just dont have the courage like Chris. Sometimes, I just wanna leave everything behind and explore the world, just me and the nature. Meet new people and learn from their experiences in life and get to another place again and see new things. '' rather than money, than love, than faith, than fairness.. give me the truth'' this is one of his quote from the movie.

People wud say that it can only happen in the movie whenever i talk about this. But look at Chris. He did it! at the end he actually died alone. But that does not matter. To me, he actually fullfilled his dream, and nobody can actually be like him. brave enough to be him. And no one can take his incredible journey and experiences from him. And that is what i want in my life. He lived his life to the fullest.

Wayne: what's you facsination with all that stuff?

Chris: im going to Alaska.

Wayne: Alaska, Alaska? or city Alaska? Because they do have markets in Alaska. The city of Alaska. Not in Alaska.

Chris: no man. Alaska. Alaska. Im going to be all the way out there, all the way out there. just on my own. no watch, no map, no axe, no nothing. no nothing. just be out there. just be out there in it. you know, big mountains, rivers, sky, game. just be out there in it, you know? into the wild.

wayne: into the wild.

chris: just wild.

wayne: yeah, what are you doing when we're there? now you're in the wild, what are we doing?

chris: you're just living man, you're just there. in that moment. in that special place and time. maybe when i get back, i can write a book about my travels.

wayne: yeah, why not?

chris: you know, about getting out of this sick society. society!

wayne: society! society!

chris: society man. you know society! cause you know what i dont understand. i dont understand why people, every person is so bad to each other so often. it doesnt make sense to me. judgement. control. all that, the whole spectrum. well, it just..

wayne: what ''people'' we're talking about?

chris: you know. parents, hypocrites, politicians, pricks.

almost at the end of his life he came to a conclusion and wrote in his book that happiness only real when shared.

isnt that true? chris mccandless adopting the moniker, ''alexander supertramp'', you are one of my hero.

ONE , TO GO!

2010-08-16T07:16:00.000-07:00

mama, A, abang, me, papa!

i am engaged!!!! i cant believe it myself! biar betul hahahha!! my cousin asked me a question on whether i felt anything different after the engagement... not at all! everything was the same. Alhamdullilah. i thot everything was going to be so serious after this. i thot i will lose my freedom etc. cried the week before. my mind was all over the place because i was so nervous! i guess that is one of the symptom ;) i did suffered the feeling where everyone felt before their engagement. i felt so nervous. my hands were shaking. it was sweating all day long. but i remember not talking much on that day. thats how i handle it. konon nye to keep it cool.. eventho it felt as tho my heart was going to explode!=( cuak kapak.....
to the people that i dint get to invite, i need to say sorry! the space was so small that i had to invite only 15 of my friends. close ones of course. lain smua family members on both side! but.. kahwin i promise to invite everyone ok! below are the pics that i would like to share with everyone. as promised! =)

ha, this was the time where i was shakiingggg!

my bff aedi n lucky. this is wat i call friendship. not the picture. them! haha. no one can replace them..

lena nisa n yi. my classmates from high school! everyone thot i was the last person to get married. they thot wrong! ;) i actually didnt expect this too =)

mama sarung cincin!

for now...
time to save money for next year! =)

Megaphone

2010-06-08T07:06:00.000-07:00

i am too irritated by my neighbour staying on top of me. they can be too loud at odd hours. pelik bin ajaib. parents pun buat dekkk aje. nak je bagi silat gayong kat sekor sekor.. haihhh! manusia manusia. bermacam2 macam manusia. sabor je la... nak je complain kat management. tapi rasa tak baik pulak... so arini, da la demam, badan rasa berpeluh, ari da la tak best, mmg la diaorg kena. bukak tingkap bilik. kita pun ckp omputih la. escusme, escusme! u r too loud! we need to sleep! keep quiet! ha.... keno koooo sebijikkkkk.. senyappp. terus cam tak de penghuni pun ada. padan muko ada orang sound... tak tau nye yg sound ni badan kecik, tolak pun terus terbang 1km. kalau nasib baik 2 km pun bole....

In Progress

2010-05-25T09:38:00.000-07:00

what can i do with rm30 in my savings? can i even take that amount of money out from the atm machines? i am broke... yeap... i really am... but taking 6 months unpaid leave was not a stupid decision i made. not at all. i am not regretting it. i never will..

1.i traveled around europe =)

2.i am mentally stable =)

3.i am a better daughter =)

4.i am a better person, from all aspects =)

5.i choose things wisely =)

6.i accepted that friends can turn out to be sumbody else =(

but the most important thing is that, i am beginning to love myself again! Alhamdullilah..

flying has really change my life. it really did. i am more matured now. i think differently than the people with my age. i see new things when i get to travel. i learn more about the aircraft which makes it always interesting and fun to fly. i hope i will never get bored of it and be an instructor one day. InsyaAllah.

Lately all i wanna do is to be in a quiet and peaceful environment. Dont mind staying at home! I hate being around people who loves to talk about others. Rasa dosa sangat being around them. They criticize others from top to bottom without actually knowing that person. Mula2 ok, but lama2 rasa pelik n boring pun ada with that kind of people. Honestly. Nobody is perfect. Be a low profile person and be nice to one another. Thats all im asking for. That is why it is so important to choose your friends or you will end up being like them. They are smart people, but yeah, its really a waste.... it really is... sigh.... Sorry to say but guys do that more ;) Ok, certain guys =)

Life is too short to waste it just like that. It is not a good way to enjoy your life. You lose everything or you end up gaining nothing. But if that is the type of enjoyment they get when meet each other, than all i am going to do is to stay away from that kinda people. Dont think i will end up losing anything!

I have no idea why i ended up talking about this. Maybe i experienced it before. I just think that people are drifting away from the good things in life...

RUGIIIKANNN?? =) takpe kita jangan jadi macam diaorg ok?! =D

New Start

2010-05-02T07:28:00.000-07:00

Heyyyyy people. how is everyone doing? life has been hactic for me i guess. or maybe its just an excuse for me for not writing a blog :) well, maybe it was a little hactic. i have been waiting for almost a month now to fly. the volcano eruption was one of the reason why my schedule was never fixed. n then there was a problem with the rostering. i believe it is a blessing in disguise. i will take it that way, as the new me will be more positive!

Alhamdullilah, i am slowly coming out from the stress that i have been having. I have discarded the people who have had contributed to the pain that i had, and also hypocrites that i thot will somehow change but never did. and people who are too emotional to think about others and became selfish. being patient is not always the right thing to do. once they take you for granted, they might do it again, and people like that are always hard to change. they will cause you pain or add up to your stress. Get to know a person reallly well, before you decide to call them a friend. that is my advice to all of u. sometimes the time spent makes you think that they are a good friend of yours. but you never know the reason why they are keeping in touch with you. they might have a motive that you will never know until the truth comes out.

Anyway, quit with the negative vibes huh! ;)

I am in the mood to write a blog again since today is the start of a good relationship between me and my other half. it is official now that i am not single! :) my future father in law InsyaAllah, came with a couple to our house to do something we call ''merisik'' in malay. On my side there was my parents n abang n two other couple. Everything went smoothly! Everything was planned and when the time comes i will write a blog about it again about my engagement that will be held in 3 months! Suddenly it feels so near! time flies.

To build a family has always been one of my dream. I have achieved what i wanted and i believe flying is in the top list for now. But once i am married, i have to know how to devide the time for my family and my career. One of my dream too, is to become an instructor. I hope i can achive that soon. I have always think that i can be a good instructor to the fresh pilots. To make sure that they really enjoy flying is one of the reason why i wanted to be that. Not only to pour the knowledge that i have, but to also build the joy towards it. I promise myself not to be the instructor that people are scared of or talk about. I want them to talk about me because they enjoy flying with me. We'll see. The day will come i am very sure of that. Kalau tak, be the captain that people enjoy flying with pun ok :) Because for now i know that flying will always be fun and relaxing if we have a good, nice captain n cabin crew together with us on the same flight.

Ni da melalut da niii! anyway korangg, i am back n see you soon!!

safe flight and be safe to wherever you are..

Goodbye 2009

2010-01-08T09:34:00.000-08:00

Hey friends,
Ive been away for quite sometime now. The only reason is to focus on myself again. Sometimes you are too busy to even realize that what matter the most is actually your own body and soul. For that i have decided to take a long break and go for a holiday and get one of the dreams that i have been wanting to achieve, done.. before the year of 2009 ends. Alhamdullilah, with the support of my family, my other half, and close friends, i got to achieve this. I went for a trip to 3 countries in europe that i have only been to one of it. The trip actually took me from Rome, to Venice - Milan - Barcelona - Granada - Madrid - and Paris. It was a memorable trip and some of it i will keep it to myself =). It will definately be too long to write about the whole trip, but I really wanna tell you how much i enjoyed seeing the Collosseum as it is one of the 7 wonders of the world. It was a dream come true i have to say. I am a very lucky girl. And I am grateful for that. To have blessed with something i considered Alhamdullilah, is something to be grateful about. I am bless with two eyes that got to see it in real life! Maybe for some i might sound a little exaggerating but who cares because that how excited and thankful i was. Knowing that it is not easy to save up money and travel made me a very grateful daughter. This year would be Taj Mahal i hope. And i hope the world will be a better place everyday because traveling did opened up my mind and made me see so many things about life and also especially on how people behave. For that, I am again grateful to be born in Malaysia. If only the people here get to see and feel what i felt and start being thankful to be a Malaysian and start treating each other well no matter how old or young we are. What kind of clothes we wear. What race and religion we are. Start respecting each other because we are all actually the same. I think it all started with people being afraid. Afraid to lose. That is when the competition starts. Then, religion and skin color becomes an issue. I wonder who is the 1st person to open up the subject about this? He must be the one who actually gave the idea and corrupted the minds of the people and started the fight between people of different races and religion back then. And they though wrong because minds are all so corrupted now that all the innocents are suffering and wars happen because of this. There is always a start to everything.

Anyway, i think i ran out so far from the topic that i wanted to talk about..... But its 4am and i am having this jet lag. Meaning im in the midst of sleeping... haha. I guess it's ok to do that as i am not a writer or even born to write a good blog or even a short story trust me, haha. excuses.. Anyway. i shud really try to sleep now... Well, i guess the conclusion is, be grateful, keep on dreaming just like me ( but of course always try to achive it :) ) and be a better person. Support each other no matter what race you are. And love your country will u.

Wanna Be Starting Something

2009-11-03T06:43:00.000-08:00

there is just so much things to write! but i just don't have the push to express my idea and feelings lately. i dint become a boring person. i just feel so tired lately. pushing myself to get up and prove everyone who knows me well that i am ok. i feel better. i do. i guess its just one of those days where i just feel like shutting everyone down and do my own thing according to my own time. i dont feel very well lately. i have been enjoying my days resting at home and go to the gym in the morning. i wanna get that positive feeling again because it really feels nice knowing that you have everything in your hand and everything works perfectly. not being that snobbish or bossy kind of lady, but someone who do things right because of her positive attitude with the help of good vibe around her. i keep on telling myself to change for the better everyday. mostly it is for my parents and my other half. i know that i try to change everyday because i do it, and not by just saying it. i think i have been a very good kid who remembers God, who does whats right in life, but there is still part of me that i am not satisfied with. and i do not know what it is. i can think rationally like any one of u. like telling myself that nobody is perfect, or people make mistakes, that kinda thing, but i know with this one thing, i can be a better person. but i just dont know what it is. these are the things that i wanna achieve in life before i die which is to travel around the world and visit the 7 wonders, have the happiest family of my own, built an orphanage house or maybe an old folks home, be a Hajjah before i am old, and get a super bike. or maybe i should train myself to accept things and handle it as it comes. see, that it my problem, i think way to much unlike any other normal human being. and i know what to do and how to make myself better. than what is actually bothering me? some people think its something that i kept inside for a very long time and i just couldnt take it anymore that it explodes now. one advice i can give is, let it go. manage your stress well, and patience is a virtue but dont keep it to yourself. tell someone you trust about it.
sorry again for the lonnng break guys. not feeling well lately but i promise to come back with a positive attitude and great strenght!

2009-10-21T08:22:00.001-07:00

ill be backkkkkkkkkk soooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnn promise guys!!! n sabaq sakinah dear! =)

Kid

2009-09-13T21:47:00.000-07:00

aritu terserempak ngan kawan lamaaaa giler. i will never forget the moment when we bumped into each other. i remember this girl looking at me, and i looked at her not as though we both knew each other.. tengok muka sampai badan pusing 90degrees tu! literally macam nak cari pasal! its like i owe her something. rasa macam dia ''Along'' pun ada haha. then she called my name. ''Shara?!!!'', n i said '' Shima??!!!'' She used to give me this nickname Tun, sebab perangai kartun je dulu. Anyway that was when we hugged each other so tight! and looked at each other and hugged again! man, i really felt like crying! she had tears in her eyes and kissed my cheek. She was my childhood friend. We were tight! She was my bestfriend! Dulu kitaorang sekolah kampung kat N9 sekali.. The last time i met her was 9 years ago! Dulu mana ada handphone lagi. Still tulis surat nak keep in touch. =) that was cute. So i met her again yesterday for a drink after buka. We had a long chat, and opened up all the sweet and funny memories. She would cycle from her place to mine almost every afternoon, and my grandma would cook something for us to eat. Korang jangan ingat rumah dia dekat. Imagine Bangsar to Midvalley for a standard 6 kid with an uphill road? Kitaorang buat khemah sekali, but only using loads of umbrella to cover ourselves. We would sit in there for hours with our so called dessert, orang melayu kata jemput2 atau cekodok ye mak.. haha. Then cari bukit paling tinggi with an ''upih pinang'' just like Lat and his kid. and we would slide down, and ran up again and down again.. sigh, i miss it =(... Then after that we would walk to the club house and wait until nobody was around to jump in the swimming pool. Because we were not allowed to go in unless we have a swimming suit. And we dont. But we always get cought by the marshaller! haha. Masa kecik mana nak fikir give up. I miss it.. so much. soooo much!! We both cried when we had to separate and go to a different school. She was always there to protect me from the bullies. Love u Shim! That was a moment where we had no problems. Nothing to worry. Young and knew nothing about life. Now we both are going to stay in touch and cherish the friendship we once had <3

Dont Upset The Rhythm

2009-09-09T01:17:00.000-07:00

I dont know where to start.

A friend told me that, she doesnt know how to change. She is frustrated with everything that is happening to her. She swears a lot now. Putting everyone she loves at the side regardless how close they once were. She is lost in the middle of nowhere. If only she has the energy to put her back in the circle. She is before a strong minded person, a very cheerful, and a very positive lady. She has all the good aura. But she is never satisfy with the way she looks. Other girls are much more prettier and outspoken then her. Other girls have that thing that makes people talk about, and wanted to be with. But she is never one of them. She can never be. She is always with her group of friends, that to her is her family too. But no matter what she can never open up her own sorrows to anyone of them. She is not secretive, but she is just someone who can listens to problems very well, but she finds it hard to open up her own. She is used to being strong for the people around her that she actually learn from their mistakes and became the person she is today. Sometimes I have this feeling that she is actually lonely inside. She needs someone that she can really talk to about anything. But she only does that to strangers. Anyone that she doesnt know at all. Maybe that guy who sits besides her at the bus stop, or the person standing next to her, reading a book. She finds them easy to talk to. Not knowing their past or present makes her realise that this is actually the people who she can make conversation with that always ended up with a smile. I wanna help her. I used to help this kind of people. I used to talk to them and make them realise that we only live once and we should always be grateful and make the best out of it. Do you know that certain behaviour that we have is actually a sickness? Something that we are lacking are making us acting the way we do. Weird acting people. People that surrounds them make a very big part of their behaviour. They can change them. They should help them by making them feel like they are part of us. Give them the confidence back. Negative thought are never good. No matter how strong we are, we can really fall, by negative thought. Especially from the people we are close with. If you love them, help them. She is my friend and i am going to help her.

22

2009-09-05T10:48:00.000-07:00

Raff,

Happy 22nd Birthday n Congrats!

We love you loads.

I told you. That everything is going to be alright in the end.

I guess 2009 is a good year for you. And 22 is a good number for u.

That is equivalent to 4. And you passed your base check on the 4th.

Or 4/9. 4+9=13, 1+3=4.

4 is your lucky number! HAHAHA.

Good luck for your line training pulak! ;)

XXXX

Setahun Hanya Sekali

2009-08-17T23:23:00.000-07:00

Ramadhan is just around the corner. I cant wait for this Raya. Maybe because itll be more meaningful now that I have someone I really love in my life. 1st raya with some good friends that actually became my bestfriends. Imagine how close we are altho we only got to kno each other for only about a year. Believe in me when I say that I know that they will be there for me thru thick and thin. Believe in me when I say that I am with someone that I am going to marry one day. Believe in me when I say that we will built our own family which will b surrounded with beautiful positive and happy people awk. We can do it awk.. Back to my friendship, bukan masa yang buat kitaorg rapat, tapi persefahaman. And luck too. Not everyone get to have a friendship that is nothing but base on sincerity. Not everyone get to be with their first love. I am lucky. Alhamdullilah. I am so grateful to be surrounded with funny weirdo people (haha), that maybe from the outsider we are just some uncool people haha. You know who you guys are. I cant be listing it down here incase there are some names that i dont wanna mention haha. Takde la.. Aritu baru balik pegi beli kain cotton nak buat baju kurung. Tak sabar nak buat! This raya if bole nak buat get together, each person bawak satu dish, semua pakai baju kurung bg lelaki, dan baju kurung bg perempuan(duh! hahahaha). Kalau tak jadi, ara siat2 korang. haha. Set a date yg semua free k. Raya pun sebulan. Unless you can give me a super good excuses for the whole month. Kalau tak, nak duit raya. I am listening to Situasi by Bunkface now. Not bad at all.. When I was a small kid, I used to memorise all the lyrics especially to Eminem. Rap je masa kecik. I memorised every word, every note, until that I could feel his emotions. Sekarang, hampeh. Tak de masa lansung... I wonder why sometimes we have to change as we grew older. We enjoyed it when we were small, so why cant we keep the feeling till we grow old. Rambut beruban putih, bongkok tiga, kulit berkedut... Mengapakah kita tidak bole rap sampai ke tua! MENGAPA! Ahahahahhahahhahaha.. Anyway.. I shud reallyy stop now... Im going to use this oppurtunity to wish everyone of you Selamat Berpuasa, semoga apa yang dilalui akan menjadi kebaikan di bulan suci ini.. Amin..

Spirit In The Night

2009-08-10T05:47:00.000-07:00

Ya Allah lamanye tak update blog. Sorry korang. Masalah dalaman dan luaran. Not really haha. Korang pernah tak, rasa macam nak buat something but then tiba-tiba idea semua hilang. Everyday ni, nak je buat new post, da depan computer, terus blank. Maka dengan sebab itu lah saya tidak tulis blog selama berminggu mingguan. Arini baru je balik dari Tianjin, China. You guys heard about that place b4? It's very near to Beijing, and it takes approx. 45mins to get there by train. Remember one of my dream is to go to the 7 wonders of the world? Tak kira la nature ke apa. I just wanna go there. Something that I have to do before I die. Tapi tak pergi2 lagi. Comfirm korang ingat saya da pegi. Haha. Mana tak nye, departure pukul 1pagi. Time manusia tido la time tu jugak la saya kena kerja da bersengkang mata. Hahaha. Block time from KUL to TSN(Tianjin) is 6hours 25mins. Sampai pukul 7 lebih baru la sampai. Urat mata nak tercabut da kalau boleh hahaha. Da siap paperwork, tiba2 masuk la ground staff nak check passengers nye form etc for H1N1. Pastu naik transport pegi hotel which took us about 20mins. Driver semalam entah dari mana, tak tahu jalan gi hotel. Hahahaha. Da la drive macam 20km/hr. Macam bersiar siar la pulak haihhh dugaaann.. Mata da naik lebam ngan berair dah ni. Sampai2 hotel, makan breakfast jugak since perut da buat karaoke lagu keroncong mak timah. Kalau boleh nak je makan sambil tutup mata. Perut da alas, kaki pun seret la masuk bilik dan etc etc then pengsan! Konon nye nak bangun pukul 12pm sebab nak pegi Beijing gi Great Wall... Great Wall ntah ke mana, train ntah ke mana, lunch pun ntah kemana. But I ended up going to a place that I have never heard before, nama nak cakap pun susah. Captain buat lawak cakap kenapa la diaorang ni cakap macam ada Kuey tiaw dalam mulut ahahhaha. Mana tak tersembur gelak bila dengar tu. Tulisan rumi diaorang tak baca. Kena la mintak pekerja hotel tu tulis tulisan diaorg. It takes about 10 minutes from the hotel with the taxi. Better place, better food... Makan sotong bakar, lamb bakar, ketam goreng! Sedappppp yang amat... Ni baru siap2 nak tido.. Kesimpulan nye I am feeling very tired and numb right now. Hahaha. Missing everyone! As you see, I have been writing nothing but trash. Hahaha. Shows how tired I am. But no matter what, I am still deeply and always be inlove with flying!!! Take care everyone!!

PS. Fayi i received your email, All the best!!! You can do anything you set your mind too ;)

Never Say Never

2009-08-07T08:28:00.001-07:00

Ill be back I promise.

Our Life Is Not A Movie Or Maybe

2009-07-05T09:53:00.000-07:00

Ola!
Sorry for keeping quiet lately. Wasn't that busy guys, but just felt a lil down lately. Probably its the weather ;)Can i just use the sameee old reason everytime? I guess im just a human, living everyday life by waking up in the morning hoping that everyday will be a new and happier day! Sometimes I get so down without knowing why. Prolly because I have been working so much and suddenly, I have 2 weeks off. I guess the body and brain just got used to thinking 24/7. Now that i have a break, the system just seems to stop working, or slower than the speed that it got used to! So I decided to do something crazy yesterday with a close friend of mine. We went to Bangkok in the morning and hopped in the last flight on the same day. I just randomly asked him whether he wanted to do that and fortunately he said yes! Thanks R. I really needed the break. To see something that you dont see everyday really helps! The people, the smell (3 millions R? hahaha, no not that smell! the people i mean!=)), the food, the highways etc, i just needed some getaway. Luckily enough my bestfriend was there with me! One of the things I did was to join Fitness First on the day itself they called me, I just wanted to do something without second thoughts and just do it! So starting tomorrow, ill be going to the gym and keep fit. I just need to be healhty and fit since I am in this industry. I hope I can make it as my hobby too so that I know what to do during my off days rather than waking up late, konon nye to recover my sleep! haha. I was a morning person but ever since i have been busy flying, my body clock just screws up big time! Not just that! I called my driving instructor, not to learn how to drive again, but to take a motorcycle license! Im just gonna go for it although I know I dont have enough savings yet to buy my own bike! 'A' gave me his old helmet. He said he gave it to me because he wanted to motivate me on riding the bike. He said he wants me to get what I want. Thank you awak. Saya appreciate sangat awak cakap macam tu. 143 mayo ;). Today I bought a DVD and its actually a concert of Michael Jackson in 1992. He is a legend. I love him. He was my childhood hero and I believe everyones hero. I had tears watching him singing. A lot of people loves him, but he also had to encounter so many accusations from people. I wonder how he coped with that kinda situation. Living a life with heartbreak but still smiles. He is a person that we dont even know but still loves him. We feel the love towards him. I feel it. I remember the day that i dreamt about him, I woke up that day and ran to my mom and told her about it. In the dream, i hugged him and I could smell him. I literally could smell him! He was so loving and caring. That was how crazy I was towards MJ. He will be missed. I hope I will live a simple but happy life with my close ones. Simple is easy. Less is more. I hope everyone is as strong as MJ. This lyric is from one of his song called Will You Be There. It is so ironic when you read or listen to all of his lyrics. Its what he actually went through in his past life. I am in tears again! =)

''In our darkest hour In my deepest despair Will you still care? Will you be there?
In my trials And my tribulations Through our doubts And frustrations In my violence In my turbulence Through my fear And my confessions In my anguish and my pain Through my joy and my sorrow In the promise of Another tomorrow I'll never let you part For you're always in my heart''

Crash Course In Polite Conversation

2009-06-27T22:37:00.000-07:00

Bonjour!

First of all, I would like to say thank you for the overwhelming support and wishes. Terima kasih semua.. I am sorry that I didnt get to reply everyone but will do my very best when I get back home InsyaAllah. I never knew that people would actually visit and read my blog since it is actually something that I do during my free time. Every now and then, when I get so excited, or when it got me thinking about life and people from this humble journey of mine, I would wanna express it by writing. When I was a small kid, I used to write in a small piece of paper about my feelings towards anything at all. I used to be a very quiet person, and still is if I dont know you, but the silent moment comes with a smile because that is just who I am. I smile to everyone because it can make my day seeing other people who doesnt even know me, smile at me. Even a stranger can make your day by just doing that because you feel appreciated as a human in some ways. Sometimes I feel like I have been living in my own world. My imagination runs wild when I am not talking or even if I am surrounded by people. Flying 40,000 feet up high and 6000 miles over got me thinking even more about my family. I appeciate them more and it made me realise that I should always try my best to be with them when I have the opportunity to. ''Ajal, maut semua ditangan tuhan'', but we can appreciate it, love it, and be happy with what's left. Wishing everyone of you the best in everything and I hope that somehow, my blog can actually change people and make them realise how lucky we are. Amin..

Songs To Love And Die By

2009-06-23T06:58:00.000-07:00

I dream on having and doing loads of stuff. People who are close to me, knows that I wanna do everything! Anything that is possible or impossible to do. I achieved one of it. Alhamdullilah. There is just so much more that I wanna do! I wanna travel the world and see all of the 7 wonders of the world. Not just the 7, but all of them! I wanna do anything for the charity. Anything at all. I wanna help them, and be part of them. I wanna travel the world and get all the knowledge that I can. I wanna have a purpose in life. Not wasting it on just waking up in the morning and doing the normalities in life. Just to do something new you know. Sky diving would be great for me! That's one of the dream that I didnt get to achieve yet, but really soon ;) I wanna try to be a good dancer. Break dance especially. Dont laugh, Im serious! =) I wanna be good in playing electric guitars because I just love rock musics. It would be a bonus for me to know what I am listening to and just rock it =) I wanna master a language, japanese maybe or french. I wanna buy a superbike one day and share the moment with my friends! My dream is to get a Ducati for myself. Now I realised that, dreaming cost a lot! Haha! But there is nothing wrong for any of us to dream. It makes you focus by pushing yourself, sometimes up to the limit that you never thought you have it! There is just so much for me to list down the things that I wanna do in life! But to keep it simple, my purpose on writing this blog is actually because I wanted to share to everyone that life is to short to just leave it as it is. It would be a waste as we live once. To be here in this world is already a gift for us. Sometimes, our biggest regrets are not for the things we did, but for the things we didn't do. Dare to dream? ;)

The Quite Things That No One Ever Knows

2009-06-16T19:21:00.000-07:00

I learn so much today. Not about flying, but about people and coping with stress. There are so many ways to overcome stress if you are good at it. Only if you are good at it. Dealing with people varies, with how you feel, how healthy and fit you are, and who you are surrounded with at that time. Do you enjoy being around them? Or are you just stuck in there with them? Sometimes the environment you are in effect the way you behave. Sometimes you change into someone that you dont want to be just to blend with it. Like being weak, or being judge by the people who doesnt even know you. Suddenly you just dont even know yourself. At first you thought you were a strong person,and all of a sudden, you became weak, with their foul languages that would just bring you down. The only way is to have a strong mind,and a strong forgiving soul. People will always assume no matter what, because they have their own ideas about you, not knowing how small they are too. Are we all here living in this world to judge, just to survive, and to strive to be the best by bringing others down? It is so easy to be nice. To let the people around you feel comfortable. It is actually the aura. But sometimes, it is just so hard for you to study a person by just talking to them. There are people who you can communicate with by just looking at them because of the good vibe. But there are another group of people that you just cant seem to understand. They are the ones who expect you to be the person they want you to be at that time.They make you feel confuse at the most simplest thing you can imagine. They make you feel stupid, but smart at the same time. And there will be a moment where you feel like they are ruling your life and your mind. They preach about religion, but does otherwise. They think that they are relaxed in a stress situation, but they are actually the people who get so uptight easily in dealing with it. Isnt it funny how human reacts? It is sad, knowing that they are older than us, but immature in thinking. It is not the age factor, but the knowledge in understanding a soul. It is hard to respect an elderly when this happen. Patience is a virtue. But how do you communicate with this kind of people without being disrespect? Have you ever face in this kinda situation?

''It´s only when you´re tested that you truly discover who you are. And it´s only when you´re tested that you discover who you can be. The person that you want to be does exist, somewhere in the other side of hard work and faith, and belief and beyond the heartache and fear of what life has''

Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly.

2009-06-15T00:32:00.000-07:00

My Denpasar flight, during cruising. Cant remember the level!

Hey! Im back! Yes 'R', Im going to update my blog now. Haha! =)
Im here in London in the hotel room trying to figure out what to do next. Did everything that a person could do when they wake up in the morning. Brushed my teeth, had my shower, and I am actually having my breakfast now while typing this. It is called multi tasking haha! Yesterday was my line check with Captain 'S'. Was flying the first 5 hours, until the next crew took over the next 6 hours and then I took over again for landing. It was so bumpy during the cruise. I couldnt even sleep during my rest period and it was so frustrating because I knew I was so tired. I dont really know why but my body feels weak for the past 4 days! I get sleepy eventhough i had 8 hours of sleep the day before. Is it the weather?? I was active in sports when I was in high school. Played so many sports and enjoyed every single of it. Especially softball and tennis. Loves squash and golf too, but right after I entered the flying school, i stopped! At first was because I didnt have the time and now, i just got used to it. But i still go to the gym once in a while. Have i been talking rubish? Haha. Anyway I tried to close my eyes hoping that I could get a solid 3 hours of sleep but failed. There was jetstreams on that part of the region. From the name you can actually know the meaning of it. It is a high speed wind exceeding 400km/h and the position and intensity of the jet stream may significantly influence aircraft operations because of the great speed at the jet core and the rapid variation of wind speed in its vicinity. It can help you get to your destination faster if you are flying in the same direction as the wind, and because of that we were 45 minutes early! Awesome but not so awesome as I didnt get a good rest haha! Suddenly I realise that I have been laughing while typing. And my last sentence will end up with me saying ''haha''! I am really really tired dont you agree?? So before I keep on laughing and go crazy, i better stop ;) ! Have a great day people! =)

Just Watch The Fireworks

2009-06-05T10:26:00.000-07:00

I am not going to talk about flying today! ;)
I'm going to talk about my friendship with a person that I got to know unexpectedly. It will be a very long story to write about, but knowing him was a blessing. He is one of my bestfriend now. Someone that I can talk to, almost about everything. He just entered the airline too! Congrats again 'R'! =) I remembered the 1st time I met him. It was a flight to Kota Bharu. Before that, we would just text each other through Facebook or MSN. I never believed in this kinda thing. Getting to know someone thru a network seems pretty 'lame' for me. Haha! But I am so grateful to have met you 'R'! He is just like me. The way he thinks and understand certain situation made me realise how easy it is to have a friend like him. We talk mostly about life and experience. It made me realise how simple it is to have a good and a healthy friendship!

Friends are everywhere. But do you have the ones that you can actually rely on, trust, understands, and the ones that you can be yourself when you are around them? If you dont, then it is going to be really hard, because all you have is yourself to talk to. You dont have anyone to give you the support when you are down or sad. If you are that kind of a person, than I would salute you.

I am so happy 'R'. Thank you for being a great friend to me and 'A'. We love you. And you promised us that you are going to built that house beside ours ;) You are a true friend 'R'. Thank you for being a great friend and a bestfriend. Hope for more happy and crazy times with you! I am going to dedicate this quote to you 'R'! It is from our favourite show =)

''Have you ever wondered what marks our time here? If one life can really make an impact on the world? Or if the choices we make matter? I believe they do. And I believe that one man can change many lives... for better or worse 'R'!

My 'A' & 'R'

Truly Madly Deeply

2009-06-02T08:31:00.000-07:00

Hi there people! Kinda miss writing my blog! How are you guys doing? Anything new?

As for me, I just got back from my 1st long haul flight. It was a training flight actually. The crew was all great! Weather was pretty nice all the way to London. Slight turbulence crossing Afghanistan, Iran and Azerbaijan because of the mountainous area. I was so lucky to capture this picture that u see on my 1st flight because it made it so memorable. This is the famous Caspian Sea. It is bound by northern Iran, southern Russia, western Kazakhstan and Turkmenistan, and eastern Azerbaijan. It has a maximum depth of about 1025 meters. The Caspian Sea is the largest inland body of water in the world! Being someone who can capture and see this in real life really somehow made me the person that I am today. I am very grateful with what I have achieved so far. Seeing great things actually made us a better person. Again, it is in the law of attractions ;). Always, always attract good things around you. You know it's been said that we just don't recognize the significant moments of our lives while they are happening. We grow complacent with ideas, or things or people and we take them for granted and it's usually not until that thing is about to be taken away from you that you've realized how wrong you've been that you realized how much you need it, how much you love it. As a human, we all face this moment. Someone actually told me that. It is so true. From now on I believe in being thankful in whatever I achieve or did not achieve along the way. No matter how screw up life can be, it will make us a better and a wiser person. So be grateful and.. Smile =)

Recovery Technique

2009-05-28T10:12:00.000-07:00

Passing 6000ft turning left after departure from KUL

*ps. i cant find u raff. can u find me? haha. well this is my favourite picture =)

Severe terbulance is define as turbulence that causes large, abrupt changes in altitude and/or attitude. Usually causes large variation in airspeed. Better fasten your seat belts guys!
Sigh.. My heart feels more or less like it is actually flying in this kinda weather. Its so severe that sometimes you just dont really know what to expect. What you see is not always what you get. How do you overcome this other than slowing down to the turbulence speed if you were the pilot flying it? But if its you, who were to face it, how do you judge it? Or how do you handle it not knowing what you see infront of you. Its like the blind flying the aircraft! Im sure there are a lot of techniques to handle certain situation. As for flying, the speeds and procedures are base on the flight test before they actually come up with such limitations or recommended techniques to recover. But as a human I guess, we dont actually get to do a test with it to know what to do when we have the problems. It's actually base on the mistakes that people made, or the mistakes that we actually did before. We should all learn from it and guide ourselves to be better the next time. We just never stop learning. And as for my career, I will learn and read till the day that I retire. And as a human, just dont test me. haha.

Would You Capture It? Or Just Let It Slip?

2009-05-24T18:57:00.000-07:00

Do you have a favourite song?
Does it always plays in your mind and sometimes you hum according to the melody? Do you have any particular song you listen to whenever you are feeling excited, or confused, or maybe even when you are focused. I used to study with loud musics on the background. Especially to rock. The louder it gets the more focused I can be. Its like it has a ''rock meter''. My performance on thinking will be better when the meter is increased to a higher level. Music has a certain power to everything we do. Our everyday life is base on music. Sometimes the lyrics can relate to whatever you are facing right now. It can either bring your spirit back up, or just entertain your feelings and bring it down down under again.

''Every song has a CODA, a final movement. Whether it fades out or crashes away. Every song ends. Is that any reason not to enjoy the music? The truth is, there is nothing to be afraid of. It's just life.''

So find that song that would always turn you to something positive again.
I have mine. It's Lose Yourself, by Eminem =)

The Trick Is To Keep Breathing

2009-05-24T01:18:00.000-07:00

I believe in law of attractions.
No matter how down you are, and how heart broken you can be, you can actually turn it all around by just thinking positive.
Life is actually wonderful but.. weird. I was just walking around the mall today, and there was a lot of people. ''A'' told me, banyak nye manusia sekarang kan awak?
I just agreed to him. Looking at them, and back at yourself again, you will see how similar you are.
Jordan's King Hussein once wrote, ''I have always believed that the road to peace lies in genuine understanding between peoples.
The more we know about one another, the more we come to realize that, in fact, we are not so different after all.''
And if you can relate to another quote by Muhammed, when He said that a person's true wealth is the good he or she does in the world, you would know what kind of life you have been living in.
Whether it's good or bad, other people can't judge it because we all have our own perception in whatever we do.
I really hope we are still living in a world where people discover who they truly are and be true to everything they do.
Life is too short to be hating one another.
And love yourself.

Today

2009-05-22T21:22:00.000-07:00

Today will be a super super good day.
Today will be a new start of everything.
Today will be the day that i will always push myself to be better for you.
Today will be the start of a friendship.
Today will be the happiest day of my life.
Today will be the day that i live like i have never lived before.
Today will be the day that even the minutes and seconds will stop
to wait for me to achieve what i want without worrying about the time.
Today will be the day that i am going to laugh out loud and burst into tears.
Today will be the day that i am going to smile even the time decided not to wait for me.
Today will be the day that i am hoping for a good closing.
Today will be the day that i wanna know myself again.
Today is My Day.
And My Day is with You.

Somewhere A Clock Is Ticking

2009-05-21T22:18:00.000-07:00

My name is Shara Azlin. I may speak like you. Walk like you. Have the same thoughts like you. Have you ever wish you could meet someone exactly like you. Just by looking at the person in the eyes, he or she would know everything that is on your mind. Sometimes you push yourself, to be better, to handle the situation with your best strenght. When you look at youself in 20 years, or 50 years, all you do is just smile at it. Smile at the moment where you were young and stupid. Some of the moments will make you cry because of the mistakes you made. You wished you could just turn it all around and start fresh with it. I am just like you. An ordinary girl, who is trying to face the truth. To go over the obstacle without fear and hatred.

This is a qoute from my favourite show. You may heard of it.
''Does this darkness have a name? This cruelty, this hatred. How did it find us? Did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it? What happened to us? That we now send our children out into the world like we send young men to war, hoping for their safe return but knowing that some will be lost along the way. When did we lose our way? Consumed by the shadows, swallowed whole by the darkness. Does this darkness have a name? Is it your name?''

Is it you? Are you one of it?
Are you searching for us to change everything and be like you?
I would love to plant your feet back on the ground.
Someday. It will happen.